Friday, February 23, 2007
Waiting to be Cooler.
Where, exactly, do I invest my time? What is it that makes me distinctly me? Regardless of the answers, I'm pretty sure a good portion of the response to both questions is "wasting time."
I've just discovered that most of my old friends from middle school/early high school are on MySpace and have been writing blogs. A part of me is a little hurt by the fact that nobody ever told me, but I know that's pretty illogical, since we've lost touch completely over the years. If I had done things differently (not necessarily better, just differently), we probably could still be friends. It makes me kind of jealous that they're all still friends, they're leading interesting lives, they've spawned unique talents, and they've grown up to look very different from before. I feel kind of left out and jealous, but I suppose that irrationality is what makes me a human being.
I know a lot of my emotions have to do with the frame of reference. Things always look rosier when you see them second hand through personal propaganda (read: social networking sites) and I'm left to wonder how I look to people on Facebook. I also wonder what they thought of me when we were friends and what they think of me now.
In other words, my desire to do something cool persists.
I've just discovered that most of my old friends from middle school/early high school are on MySpace and have been writing blogs. A part of me is a little hurt by the fact that nobody ever told me, but I know that's pretty illogical, since we've lost touch completely over the years. If I had done things differently (not necessarily better, just differently), we probably could still be friends. It makes me kind of jealous that they're all still friends, they're leading interesting lives, they've spawned unique talents, and they've grown up to look very different from before. I feel kind of left out and jealous, but I suppose that irrationality is what makes me a human being.
I know a lot of my emotions have to do with the frame of reference. Things always look rosier when you see them second hand through personal propaganda (read: social networking sites) and I'm left to wonder how I look to people on Facebook. I also wonder what they thought of me when we were friends and what they think of me now.
In other words, my desire to do something cool persists.
Labels: life, philosophy
Thursday, January 25, 2007
Birds of Prey and Barack Obama
The Bird:
Today while I was walking from the bookstore, library mall was crowded with passing-period traffic. All of the sudden, a hawk comes streaming down at head level, perpendicular to the flow of traffic, and lands on the ground near the feet of a 30-something year old woman. Not only does nobody look at this large bird that cut through their fields of vision, but the woman it landed next to didn't even stop to glance at the hawk that was bold enough to perch 3 feet in front of her for no apparent reason. No interest, no delight, no fear. Just cell phone. After a few seconds of hopping around, it flew up onto a bench and didn't move when people passed close enough to touch it. Me? I stared at it until I couldn't stare anymore. I stared at the faces of all the people around and no one else was even looking at it. There was a freaking bird of prey that practically landed on a group of hundreds of human beings and it didn't care. It was beautiful, it was large, and it was fearless.
One might blame the Millennial generation's ipod/cell phone isolation in a world of personal bubbles and non-places, but I could hardly believe that nobody saw it. You can be so grossed in conversation that you don't see someone pick your pocket but when a hawk comes flying in front of your face you'll at least see it. It just really seemed like nobody cared. What does that mean? Am I the only one impressed with reality anymore?
Obama:
I first saw this man a few months back on the Tonight Show and didn't know who he was. I was, however, immediately intrigued by him. If you also liked that interview, you should see his cheeky spot on The Daily Show. I like the approach he's taken to blurring the lines between parties. Instead of ignoring questions and being vague, he's bringing issues from both sides. For example, I watched a video on You Tube in which he said "The pundits like to slice and dice our country into red states and blue states. Red states for republicans, blue states for democrats, but I've got news for them, too. We worship an awesome God in the blue states, and we don't like federal agents poking around our libraries in the red states. We coach little league in the blue states and yes, we've got some gay friends in the red states." This appeals to me particularly because I don't vote party, I vote issue. It's clear that you can't always side with one group over the other because the issues are all across the board.
Now, I know that political candidates intentionally monitor their demeanors and meticulously pick out stances, phrases, and chronologies of events and there's a part of me that doesn't want to be manipulated by sneaky behavior and intentional scheming. I know Obama probably knew from the start that he was going to run for president while he muttered about how big of a responsibility it was and how he was hesitant to take on the campaign as he feigned doubt, but at the same time, should we not give him credit for making me want to believe him? Isn't his charisma and careful planning the mark of an intelligent man worthy of holding office? (Before you start to cite Hitler, I'm not THAT taken by him to not notice when people are subjugated and violated.) He still had the sense to respond properly and it gives him a realistic aurora that respects a powerful job and thinks twice before taking reign of the country.
I also watched a CNN analysis of his outfits on You Tube, how he goes for the dress shirt and jacket (sans tie) look. It talked about how G.W. Bush and Reagan went for the jacket-less rancher look instead of rich country club playboy, how Kennedy went for the leisurely dad look, and how Nixon failed with the "I can't even walk the beach without looking like I'm itching to go back to the office" look. This was all interesting until CNN compared his garb to that of the Iranian president's, implying that it made him a bad person to go without a tie since the other guy did. Let me just say this: Keira Knightley may wear boot-cut pants but that doesn't mean I'm copying her or we're secretly alike. It just means we both want to achieve the same messages with our wardrobe. We want to avoid trendy-ness without looking awkward. They want to be the people's men. I applaud Obama because it's a soothing look, a nice blend between casual and formal, and it's damn flattering on him. End of story. CNN also went on to say "Not only is his last name Obama, which rhymes with Osama, but his middle name is Hussein like Saddam Hussein. Maybe he wants to re-think this." For one, unless he changed his name, it was what he's given. I'm named after Stephanie Powers but that doesn't mean I admire her, in fact, I don't even know who she is. Not to mention, 1. Hussein is an revered ethnic name that often crops up in Arabic/Muslim culture, 2. His name is an exact replica of his father's, Barack Hussein Obama Senior, and 3. Not only does Obama rhyme with Osama, but it also rhymes with llama, comma, pajama, Bahama, Adama (Yes, Jackie), Mama, o-rama, drama, miasma, trauma, aroma, magma, dogma, edema, diorama, Brahma, mahatma, Yokohama, chroma, Takoma, and countless Japanese words.
You know, even if he does turn out to be the evil liberal hippie who is stealing America from whites like angry republicans like to pretend that he (or anyone who draws attention to white privilege) is, I really don't care. We've spent so much time on the other extreme that I would say our nation could even use someone like that. I think it's funny that the majority says "let's be careful now, you don't want someone too liberal - we like balance, or this country will go to hell. We don't like the extreme white male political system we live in but it would be an atrocity to take our dislike too far." It's cute how they like to pretend that there's a way we can err enough in one candidate to ever account for the ridiculous one-sidedness we've been facing since our country was founded.
I have to say, I'm excited to watch Obama's progression. I want to read one of his books this summer. Anyone know anything about him?
I have to admit, my political interests will never be dormant again after getting so emotionally involved in the fight against the gay marriage ban last fall.
Today while I was walking from the bookstore, library mall was crowded with passing-period traffic. All of the sudden, a hawk comes streaming down at head level, perpendicular to the flow of traffic, and lands on the ground near the feet of a 30-something year old woman. Not only does nobody look at this large bird that cut through their fields of vision, but the woman it landed next to didn't even stop to glance at the hawk that was bold enough to perch 3 feet in front of her for no apparent reason. No interest, no delight, no fear. Just cell phone. After a few seconds of hopping around, it flew up onto a bench and didn't move when people passed close enough to touch it. Me? I stared at it until I couldn't stare anymore. I stared at the faces of all the people around and no one else was even looking at it. There was a freaking bird of prey that practically landed on a group of hundreds of human beings and it didn't care. It was beautiful, it was large, and it was fearless.
One might blame the Millennial generation's ipod/cell phone isolation in a world of personal bubbles and non-places, but I could hardly believe that nobody saw it. You can be so grossed in conversation that you don't see someone pick your pocket but when a hawk comes flying in front of your face you'll at least see it. It just really seemed like nobody cared. What does that mean? Am I the only one impressed with reality anymore?
Obama:
I first saw this man a few months back on the Tonight Show and didn't know who he was. I was, however, immediately intrigued by him. If you also liked that interview, you should see his cheeky spot on The Daily Show. I like the approach he's taken to blurring the lines between parties. Instead of ignoring questions and being vague, he's bringing issues from both sides. For example, I watched a video on You Tube in which he said "The pundits like to slice and dice our country into red states and blue states. Red states for republicans, blue states for democrats, but I've got news for them, too. We worship an awesome God in the blue states, and we don't like federal agents poking around our libraries in the red states. We coach little league in the blue states and yes, we've got some gay friends in the red states." This appeals to me particularly because I don't vote party, I vote issue. It's clear that you can't always side with one group over the other because the issues are all across the board.
Now, I know that political candidates intentionally monitor their demeanors and meticulously pick out stances, phrases, and chronologies of events and there's a part of me that doesn't want to be manipulated by sneaky behavior and intentional scheming. I know Obama probably knew from the start that he was going to run for president while he muttered about how big of a responsibility it was and how he was hesitant to take on the campaign as he feigned doubt, but at the same time, should we not give him credit for making me want to believe him? Isn't his charisma and careful planning the mark of an intelligent man worthy of holding office? (Before you start to cite Hitler, I'm not THAT taken by him to not notice when people are subjugated and violated.) He still had the sense to respond properly and it gives him a realistic aurora that respects a powerful job and thinks twice before taking reign of the country.
I also watched a CNN analysis of his outfits on You Tube, how he goes for the dress shirt and jacket (sans tie) look. It talked about how G.W. Bush and Reagan went for the jacket-less rancher look instead of rich country club playboy, how Kennedy went for the leisurely dad look, and how Nixon failed with the "I can't even walk the beach without looking like I'm itching to go back to the office" look. This was all interesting until CNN compared his garb to that of the Iranian president's, implying that it made him a bad person to go without a tie since the other guy did. Let me just say this: Keira Knightley may wear boot-cut pants but that doesn't mean I'm copying her or we're secretly alike. It just means we both want to achieve the same messages with our wardrobe. We want to avoid trendy-ness without looking awkward. They want to be the people's men. I applaud Obama because it's a soothing look, a nice blend between casual and formal, and it's damn flattering on him. End of story. CNN also went on to say "Not only is his last name Obama, which rhymes with Osama, but his middle name is Hussein like Saddam Hussein. Maybe he wants to re-think this." For one, unless he changed his name, it was what he's given. I'm named after Stephanie Powers but that doesn't mean I admire her, in fact, I don't even know who she is. Not to mention, 1. Hussein is an revered ethnic name that often crops up in Arabic/Muslim culture, 2. His name is an exact replica of his father's, Barack Hussein Obama Senior, and 3. Not only does Obama rhyme with Osama, but it also rhymes with llama, comma, pajama, Bahama, Adama (Yes, Jackie), Mama, o-rama, drama, miasma, trauma, aroma, magma, dogma, edema, diorama, Brahma, mahatma, Yokohama, chroma, Takoma, and countless Japanese words.
You know, even if he does turn out to be the evil liberal hippie who is stealing America from whites like angry republicans like to pretend that he (or anyone who draws attention to white privilege) is, I really don't care. We've spent so much time on the other extreme that I would say our nation could even use someone like that. I think it's funny that the majority says "let's be careful now, you don't want someone too liberal - we like balance, or this country will go to hell. We don't like the extreme white male political system we live in but it would be an atrocity to take our dislike too far." It's cute how they like to pretend that there's a way we can err enough in one candidate to ever account for the ridiculous one-sidedness we've been facing since our country was founded.
I have to say, I'm excited to watch Obama's progression. I want to read one of his books this summer. Anyone know anything about him?
I have to admit, my political interests will never be dormant again after getting so emotionally involved in the fight against the gay marriage ban last fall.
Labels: Barack Obama, life, philosophy, politics
Friday, January 19, 2007
It Never Feels Good
I have lost the moral battle against the University Bookstore. When I was a kid (freshman year) I decided to sell all of my books on the t3h int3rw3bz instead of the bookstore where I would get back 1/10 of what I paid. Unfortunately I sold only one and have now given in. My last few semesters sold pretty well, but I returned with 5 or 6 unsellable ones from the early days. I suppose it makes sense that the sucky books were the ones I was forced to keep, since the teachers realized they were sucky and no longer wants to use them, but it saddens me all the same. All in all I guess I am still glad just to be rid of most of them. As for the rest...perhaps burning is in order. I also bought my new books for this semester and this is how we come to the title of this entry. It never feels good to fork out hundreds of dollars for a daunting task you don't want to enter your life. Especially when one of the teachers that teaches one of your classes EVERY SEMESTER through the interior design curriculum decides EVERY SEMESTER that you should buy 3 books you'll never read that cost 60-90 dollars.
If my plan worked, you'll have read the last paragraph unquestioningly and you'll have been successfully roped into my blog once again without even noticing my 7 month hiatus. Sorry, I don't know how that happened, although my mandatory blog for English 201 certainly helped. Speaking of which, I don't like blogsome. Especially when you compare it to blogger being run by google, which is amazing. Google will take over the world and I don't even mind.
Thanks to a number of things (my RA returning essay, recent conversations, Jackie's blog, and death) I've been very thoughtful lately. I have realized that although it is financially stressed and there is always a million and one things I'm dying to do, my life is pretty damn good. It's better than the alternative of being bored all of the time. Thanks to being an RA I've learned amazingly much over the last semester about people, interacting with people, social justice, the importance of speaking out, and ignorance. Also, my supervisors believe I have done a good job being an RA so I have some job security. I'm engaged (Oh yeah, that's why I didn't blog all summer, I wanted a proper entry for the news before I blogged about anything else...well I guess that will come next) and I'm happier than ever and really enjoying making plans, since fancy details are right up my alley. I will never again have to worry about my future or who will love me because I will always have Gordon. (I'm considering making a wedding blog, by the way, mostly for myself as a way to log memories than for anyone else.) I was just accepted into the professional interior design sequence, so I don't have to worry about that anymore. I guess the conclusion I've reached is that although I've been thrown some curve balls and misfortunes in life, I have handled them well and for that I am both prosperous and proud of myself. No amount of good luck feels better than bad luck turned around with a little elbow grease.
I miss the random pictures, so here you go, care of White Ninja:
If my plan worked, you'll have read the last paragraph unquestioningly and you'll have been successfully roped into my blog once again without even noticing my 7 month hiatus. Sorry, I don't know how that happened, although my mandatory blog for English 201 certainly helped. Speaking of which, I don't like blogsome. Especially when you compare it to blogger being run by google, which is amazing. Google will take over the world and I don't even mind.
Thanks to a number of things (my RA returning essay, recent conversations, Jackie's blog, and death) I've been very thoughtful lately. I have realized that although it is financially stressed and there is always a million and one things I'm dying to do, my life is pretty damn good. It's better than the alternative of being bored all of the time. Thanks to being an RA I've learned amazingly much over the last semester about people, interacting with people, social justice, the importance of speaking out, and ignorance. Also, my supervisors believe I have done a good job being an RA so I have some job security. I'm engaged (Oh yeah, that's why I didn't blog all summer, I wanted a proper entry for the news before I blogged about anything else...well I guess that will come next) and I'm happier than ever and really enjoying making plans, since fancy details are right up my alley. I will never again have to worry about my future or who will love me because I will always have Gordon. (I'm considering making a wedding blog, by the way, mostly for myself as a way to log memories than for anyone else.) I was just accepted into the professional interior design sequence, so I don't have to worry about that anymore. I guess the conclusion I've reached is that although I've been thrown some curve balls and misfortunes in life, I have handled them well and for that I am both prosperous and proud of myself. No amount of good luck feels better than bad luck turned around with a little elbow grease.
I miss the random pictures, so here you go, care of White Ninja:
Labels: blogging hiatus, life, textbooks
Online Masters Degree
