It was originally filmed in the Year 2000, but was never released to the general public due to its horrifying nature.

All that survives of this lost treasure are a few still prints which we have preserved for the Mozart Cafe's Archives,

and which we will show here and now for your approval, during this Halloween season. It is the story of an afternoon gone wrong and a hike in the woods that turned into...DISASTER!

Our tragic story begins on a chilly day in early autumn, at the edge of the fabled Vienna Woods. It was a day of creative activity for W.A.Mozart, who had been blissfully dreaming of a fine new composition with which to please the whole world. He had been invited to the country house of Englishman Josiah Blair, a mysterious impressario from London who wished to be...alone. Little did the unsuspecting Mozart know that his pleasant sojurn in the woods would end so tragically.








Mozart walked deeper into the woods, following the instructions on his map to the exact letter. He had lost track of where he'd disembarked from the carriage which brought him to the woods, but that was of little concern to him at that moment. After all, he had his map and it was still daylight, and surely Blair's house would be at the end of the road. Mozart was not worried. He still had a song in his heart and a smile on his face, and his innocence remained unsullied. Night had not yet fallen, but dusk was fast rising. He wondered if the road would ever end.








As the sun began to hang low, the woods seemed only to have thickened. The map must have been wrong. Mozart was puzzled, and for the first time in his journey, he felt...disturbed. Perhaps he had been given the wrong directions. Perhaps he should have taken the carriage after all. Perhaps he should have found out who the hell this damn fool Blair fellow was, after all. But alas, it was too late! The road only seemed to lead him around in circles, and soon he was back where he had once started, oh so many hours ago. The same trees were there. The same rocks. The same cobwebs and spiders. The same squirrels and rabbits. Even the same creepy music swimming around in his head, annoying the heck outta him!








The forest seemed to go on and on, and everything was growing very dark. Owls hooted ominously in the treetops, their eyes glowing with quiet threat. When would this ordeal in the darkness end?






Darkness swelled and Mozart began to panic. He had only a tiny flashlight with a weak battery, and he could make no more sense of the useless map. Once again, he had gone around in a wide circle, and still the carriage was gone. The spiders were gone, and so were the squirrels. An owl swooped down and ate one of the rabbits! It was a dire sign of terrible things to come. Then Mozart thought of his arch enemy, Salieri. Perhaps Salieri was lurking behind a tree, ready to pounce out at him. He was sure to yell "BOO!" and Mozart's skin crawled with rising fear. He began to prespire profusely, and even had a brief hallucination of seeing a statue of the Commendatore coming down from a pedestal.








And there it was at last, the hidden house of Josiah Blair. But no pleasant country dwelling this! This was a house of haunted repute! Many horrible things had happened in this cabin of dread, and Mozart had nowhere else to go. It was either knock on the door and hope for the best, or perish in the endless woods. Perhaps, he hoped, it was all a bad joke. He would knock on the door and light would stream fourth, and Mr.Blair would invite him in to use the telephone and to watch a bit of telly while some kindly soul came to his rescue. Yet it was, as he knew in his heart, a vain hope. He was about to walk headlong into a fate worse than death.








Oh woe and woe again to the sad fate that bewaited W.A.Mozart! But there was no going back! There was no telephone, no telly, no waiting carriage to run to, not even a bad map to follow--for in his anxiety, he had ripped it to shreds and eaten it. And he knew the legends of the haunted woods! Salieri lurked there. Salieri waited around corners to jump out and yell "BOO!" Salieri would force him to stand in a corner, and would do something unspeakable to him. That was when he realized that there was no such person as Josiah Blair at all--it had always been...Salieri!








"Oh, have mercy on me, Salieri!" Mozart wept in the dark, shining his flashlight directly into his own eyes as if to insure his inability to see a way of escape. "I am drawn to you like a moth to a flame. I have no way to escape! Do not poison me! Do not bore me to death by taking dictation from me. Just show me the way back to the carriage, and I will even let you sign your name to my Requiem."








Alas was the inevitability of Mozart's fate. He approached the cabin door and saw a cloaked figure in black, spreading his cape. It was an Undead person, without question. But it wasn't Salieri. Oh no. It was far worse than Mozart's wildest nightmares. It was....his father Leopold!








Oh weep, my friends, for the sad fate of Mozart. The Vampire Leopold seized him in his clutches, flung his cape around him, and bit him in the neck. Blood poured freely on the steps of Blair's cabin. Salieri wasn't even within fifty miles of the woods, and Josiah Blair never existed at all. Leopold had stolen the carriage and emailed his son a false and trecherous map. Now his blood lies upon the forest floor, and he shall evermore be a creature of the night!
While creepy music plays, Father and son shall haunt the Vienna Woods....together...for all eternity!

And thus ends the tragic story of THE BLAIR WAM PROJECT











If you enjoyed this film and would like for others to see it,
then feel free to take this ticket stub and link it back to this page--
but you must RIGHT-CLICK your mouse and save it to your own files,
or the Vampires Leopold and Wolfgang may get you, too!