Jack of all Trades


The Floundering Father

This summary is from the old Studios USA site. It was written from the viewpoint of Jack Stiles:

I wake up to a racket Emilia's making in her lab. She's working on her tin sardine can ­ she claims it's some sort of submarine. Next thing I know the parrot Jean-Claude is at the door and informs us that the dreaded pirate Blackbeard is scheduled to arrive at the secret dock on the north shore of the island. Well, we sneak right over to the dock and catch Croque and Brogard greeting Blackbeard, and he's got a hooded prisoner with him. I can't believe my eyes when Blackbeard rips off the hood and it's non other than my main man, Benjamin Franklin (John Sumner). Later, we sneak into the prison where they're holding Franklin. Turns out they want to bring him to France to build a weapon of mass destruction for Napoleon! There's no way to break Franklin out now, but I figure we can nab him first thing in the morning when he is being transported back to the ship.

The next morning we put our plan into action. Emilia creates a diversion for Blackbeard (she's getting pretty good at that sort of thing). I swoop up who I think is Ben, but I can't believe it when I stop to remove his hood, and it's actually Brogard! I knew it was too easy! Just when Brogard thinks he's got the Dragoon trapped, Emilia knocks him out cold. By the time we get back to the beach we see Franklin sail away on Blackbeard's ship.

Believe it or not, Em's tin can has a use after all, and we go after Ben. She's already figured out where they've got Ben stashed, and we attach the sub right to the underside of the boat and drill a hole directly into it. Emilia gets Ben into the sub while I fight the kerosene swigging, fire burping Blackbeard on the deck of the ship. That guy is gross! Just as I get back to the sub, Emilia's saying something about the propulsion system not getting any power. I've got to get away from that pirate so I volunteer to be the conductor, and grab both coils. That was a shocker! We make it back to the island and leave that stinky Blackbeard with a sinking ship. Of course Ben is forever in our debt, and as he leaves for the good old U. S. of A. he even tells Emilia and I that we're the beginning of a lasting partnership between America and England.

Starring: Bruce Campbell (Jack Stiles), Angela Dotchin (Emilia Rothschild), Stuart Devenie (Governor Cr oque), Stephen Papps (Captain Brogard), Shemp Wooley (The Voice of Jean-Claude)

Guest Stars: Hori Ahipene (Blackbeard), John Sumner (Benjamin Franklin)


Written by Roberto Orci & Alex Kurtzman
Directed by Chris Graves



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