Jack and Emilia get word from Jean-Claude that the crown of King George III has been stolen. It has been taken to a resort on Agony Island. They must travel there to get it back. After they arrive, the twosome is greeted by the sadistic Marquis de Sade. He immediately enforces his strict rules of pain by forcing Jack to wear a dog collar and Emilia to carry a whip to keep him in line.

Once they are settled in their room at the "hotel of pain", Jack and Emilia are forced into changing into uncomfortable clothing as part of the Marquis' rules. On their way to look for the crown the two run into Governor Croque and Captain Brogard, who are strapped to leashes and acting like dogs for two women. Croque asks Jack and Emilia what they are doing on Agony Island. Emilia replies that she wants to teach Jack all about discipline. Croque reveals that the Marquis de Sade is his distant cousin.

Later, Jack and Emilia disguise themselves as waiters in order to overhear Croque and the Marquis plot with each other. It turns out the Marquis de Sade was the one who stole the royal crown of England, with the blame being placed on America so that England and the United States will wage war on each other. Napoleon can then move his armies in and take what is left once the two nations are greatly diminished. Jack and Emilia decide to enter the "triathalon of pain". The winning team will earn a chance to visit the Marquis' private mansion to view his latest acquisition, which is the crown.

Jack and Emilia win the "triathalon of pain". But it wasn't an easy victory. They had to act like dogs, carry an egg on a spoon with just Jack's mouth, and ride a bicycle with a needle-of-a-seat. During the Marquis' unveiling that evening, Jack disguises himself as the Dragoon and steals the crown back. Once they return to Pulau Pulau, Emilia sends the crown back to England on one of her exporting ships.

Starring: Bruce Campbell (Jack Stiles), Angela Dotchin (Emilia Rothschild), Stuart Devenie (Governor Croque & Marquis de Sade), Stephen Papps (Captain Brogard), Shemp Wooley (The Voice of Jean-Claude)

Guest Stars: Michael Hallows (Gunter), Trasa Dilks (Helga), Sarah Leo (Woman), Simon Roborgh (Attendant #1), Lulu Alach (Brogard's Dominatrix), Marek Summich (Croque/Marquis Camera Double)

Written by Timothy A. Jones
Directed by Eric Gruendemann